You've Built Worlds, Haven't You?

"Building your little worlds again, friend?" Yes, I was. If you would be so kind as to bugger off, I can get back to crafting this sunrise.
"Is it fun to play God?" Yes, It is. It's only the natural thing to do, really. The world is a pretty rough place. It's not hard to make a better one.
"Your world won't ever exist, why do you keep doing this lucid dreaming stuff? This is the third time this week you've woken up having conversations with yourself." It was a more interesting conversation than the one we're having now, you chump.
"You haven't been to class in weeks. This experiment is making you crazy man. Crazy." You don't understand, nor will you ever. What I'm doing here has basis, man. I've been going into the same reoccuring dreams for years now. When I go to sleep, I'm awake again and starting another day. The people I meet have conversations, they welcome me back. They mark the passage of time from one day to the next, remember events. Ever since I started this lucid dreaming kick I've become more and more aware each day. I'm starting to build now. I crafted the most wonderful moonlit field last night. It's full of lilies, soft and waving. The air is scented with the tender, subtle scent of lavender. There's a creek running along side it, with smoothly flowing water that touches gently at its sides. And the moonlight is so bright that you can see particles of ether floating in the area, reflecting its light between them. It was so shimmery that the entire scene looked as if it were created in bright ocean water then infused with faerie dust.
"Yeah. Must be gorgeous to take nothing and turn it into something. That actually, is still really nothing." You don't understand, again. Last night, I fell in love. It's why I built the field, you know. It was for her.
"For her? What? Man, you've lost it. You've fallen in love with a figment of your imagination. Want me to call your doctor? You need to be checked. I think you're depressed." She's as real as you are.
"Not bloody likely." Well, I touched her last night. I felt her next to me, her breath tinged with honey. Not like your shitty breath. And she loved me. Down to my core, she loved every single bit of me. She never had to say it. She never had to display it. It was simply true, an unbreakable law of this world. Absolute. And I loved her the same. She was the one I was born for, my other half. I left half of my soul on the other side of a sleep-torn mirror.
"Friend, she doesn't exist." Who are you to tell her that? She said the same when I awoke from speaking to you.
"Can you hurry up and eat your food? We have a soccer match in half an hour. Starts at 5. Victory will be ours. Leave your dreams alone and get on the field with me." How long are we playing for?
"Until we win, or pass out trying." Nice.
"I'm heading to bed dude. Don't sit there staring at your screen all night. Tomorrow will be a new day.And stop with that lucid dreaming shit." Not bloody likely. I have a date tonight.
Sitting under the moonlight, looking up into the far deep sky, I wonder if all of this is worth it. Hmmm, I felt your head move a bit. You alright?
"...as real...you are." Huh? I didn't hear what you said, what's up?
"... As long as I'm with you, I'm fine. Thank you." I couldn't help but smile a bit. Morning was coming. It was time for a new day, a better one.
"You know, I think people don't appreciate us." They don't have to. We are a universe of two.Did I tell you that you sound beautiful when you just wake up?
"The worlds alot bigger than just us. They don't believe you exist, you know." I laughed out loud. Who are they to say? I'm right here, aren't I? Let me show you - You're so soft, can I use you as a pillow?
"Take anything you want from me." I can do this forever. I would stare into your eyes for the rest of eternity.
"And I, yours."
"I love you."
I love you.
Building your little worlds again, friend?
"Yes, I was."


...You've built worlds
"...haven't you?"

Casino Spanish Eyes

This man; His heart was close to frozen

And forever ached for time to thaw it.

He had worked on his warmth-wont wall

So that no-one could ever hurt him.

His hands held the kinds of worried warmth

Known to men who were short on time,

As if life was merely granted, not given

And could be taken at proper sign.

So he slowly started to lose himself

In the wild winters of an improper world,

Growing numb to others troubles,

But then he met the girl -

-

El verano, seguido del invierno

El hielo empezó a descongelar -

En el agua, que encontró el amor

Y ahí es donde se perdió todo

-

And she beautifully betrayed him,

So his walls were brought back in force.

To never again let the sunlight in,

To never let emotion beget remorse.

Broken Heart

It seemed a fading dream, a destruction of my fantasies and all that I held dear - Causing a brief moment of unwarranted true fear in the disguise that never quite hid the lie. Why try? Neon lights lit the meeting, obscuring the darkened sky, while I? I sat and held my pain in check, not wanting their cruise to become my trainwreck and land a wet smarting blow to what I knew was a true-blue friendship. They hugged again, and he played with her hair while she reciprocated with a stare that caused my heart to skip - It wasn't fair!
I tried, but perhaps I did something to cause her to shy away and finally seek solace in this guy who I knew had no intention to hurt me. I joked and played, a master at keeping others away - friendly, but holding them at bay to feelings that had been born that day.
I sipped my drink, and feigned at making merry while I worried that if I should tarry my wall would fall leaving me haggard and harried at the mercy of the public eye. I soon got my wish.
Arm in arm they left the scene, and I soon thereafter and between my breaking dreams and their joyful laughter I departed not wanting anything to do with the matter and better off not knowing what happened after. I got into my car and drove off, chasing my friends and knowing that scene of my life was a closed chapter and worrying about it would only make it worse. Of course, I still think back to that night and it's impact as it shattered an illusion I harbored for no real reason. But the seasons, like the wind change their direction and the summer of my love would give way to the coldness of my winter. But at least the snow allows for a clear reflection, and spring is just around the corner.

So between the tears and ye rosebuds,
I won't gather the fading flowers,
I'll keep my way, won't lose my step-
Nor water my dessicate sorrow.

Name; Revised

What would you say to me

If I told you that all things

have a name?

A name, created forever ago-

A name singular, secret and sacred-

A name that grants form?

What if I told you

that if you cried out

The Name of the Moon,

You could bathe at mid-day

under its dappled, failing shine-

playing partner to its light?

That if you called to the skies

you could surround yourself

with a span of azure infinity,

Paint sun-songs with hidden words,

Or caress cloud-worn creations while

floating in blue nothingness?

To think; You could merely utter

The Name of Oceans - That

vast implication; You could

Summon distant, breaking shores

for your own inspection and approval-

To satisfy the simplest curiosity?

Would you say it was a fantasy?

Something grand to ponder;

And then regretfully forget?

That to strum the chords of creation

with key-words and mere intentions,

Is a blasphemy?

But what if... What if

I spoke to you the Name of Love,

As soft as daylight-sighs ending?

Would you scoff at my audacity,

To arrogantly manipulate its meaning

by not letting it go free?

Or would you realize, and see-

That despite all that power, I can't find

the name for what you mean to me?

To Friends!

In life there are many winding roads

Which when approached, seem to give

No clue as to what's behind the bends-

We call this confusion - Youth.

As we grow, the roads seem to mold

Themselves into the "Straight and Narrow"

But you can always find someplace new

If you have the courage to continue and

Although things may seem confusing so

You worry about whats behind the bends,

Remember that a path can handle a few

The other willing being - Your friends.

So -

To where life takes us!

To a fate of becoming Men!

For honor, good hugs, the power of love,

To tackling those twisty bends!

From the Majesty of the Morning Sun,

Till the Evening Star greets our Glorious Ends!

For Stars and Flight, Infusing Light,

To our Fatalistic Forever -

To Friends!

Personified

I.

In this mistake, I am personified -

To try and shatter the long lines

of restrictive reality - I move

backward - To when I was asleep

and for good or ill - I could fight

to save magic.

II.

In this observation, I am personified -

To see sun-lined clouds

and believe wholeheartedly

That I don't know what's behind them.

III.

In this realization, I am personified -

A Man shows his worth in few things-
To keep confidence, To
be able to be counted on,
The ability to make a stand -
And to love unconditionally.
I'm still working on all of them.

IV.

In this truth, I am personified

That no matter how hard I try,

I will never be able to go back

To when life was simple,

And I had no real words for beauty.

Aria

Once, I tried to paint a picture of you,
With words. It didn't work.
Somehow my colors didn't reflect your light
In just the way I wanted.
Frustrated, I tried again to master my brush
And set it to it's task,
But forcing it only marred the picture,
And that - I couldn't have.
I finally had to tell myself that I had tried
To bridge two worlds.
For my hued words were but your simile,
My painting - Your doomed metaphor.

I'm BACK.

Hey Blog, I'm back! I'll be posting some work shortly :D